I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
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