Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Randomize