shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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