he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
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