are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
