i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
