He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
