i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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