Well apparently he's into motor boating.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
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