Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Randomize
