So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Who died my cat blue again?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
