someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
