do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
