Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize