How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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