STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
