I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Randomize
