I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
