sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Randomize
