I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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