I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
