Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
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