Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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