She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
