So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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