Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
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