i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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