Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
