He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
