Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
