i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
