I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
