i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
