Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
