thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
