But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
