i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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