In the future we'll all be gay
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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