Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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