well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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