It was confusing and full of hummus
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Randomize
