He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I just forgot I was standing up.
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