I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
