How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
