We're facebook friends in real life
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
