hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
At least make sure they are 18
Why
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize
