I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Randomize
