My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
