her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
