Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I'm both gender and math confused
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
