Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
