So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Randomize