...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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